Second time's the charm

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan knocked on Kaitlin's family's door a few nights after their first... meeting. He hoped that she was here, though he had not let her know that he was coming. But he had been wanting to see her again for almost four days now, and that, to the impatience of Nathan, had seemed to last a lifetime. So, maybe she would be here? And maybe her sister and her mother and father would not. That was the hope that he wanted. He was let in by a servant and Nathan asked the boy to "please fetch the Lady Kaitlin" for him, if she was in fact, in. So Nathan stood on the inside of the door and awaited her arrival, hoping she was here and that she too wished to see him.

It was very late at night, and Nathan had risked coming here. Most people were asleep, but he could never tell would be out and about looking for something gossip about. He knew they could not stay here, most likely, but there had to be somewhere where they could go... He would wait until he knew she would come with him. Then he would make plans. For now, he would be anxious.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin Rose had been dressing for bed when her drowsy, worn out, maid had told her there was a visitor requesting her presence at the door. She threw on a slight robe and begged her maid to get some sleep. The poor thing looked like she was about to pass out right there. The woman eagerly did as she was told. Kaitlin knew her sister was on call for the Queen that night and possibly the King for more intimate purposes. She could never bring herself to do such things. Her mother was sound asleep and her father was out with the men drinking and squandering his daily earnings on booze and tavern whores. She shook the thoughts away and went to the door. When she saw the man who had come to see her her heart started racing.
Nathan.
She hadn't seen him in a few days. She had missed him terribly. Not even being able to look at him during the few moments they had passed each other was torture.
"Nathan.... she breathed.
Quickly looking around, making sure no eyes saw them she ushered him into her family's apartment.

Kaitlin hugged him as soon as the door was bolted shut behind them. Her arms circled his strong waist and her head rested on his muscular chest. She sighed happily as joy flooded over her. She had missed him so much! She looked into his eyes and kissed him softly. Those lips got her every time! She smiled at him.
"I was worried that you were trying to avoid me. she played.

[Nathan Brown]

Kaitlin.

How wonderful it was to see her! And in her night things, for one. She looked gorgeous even when she wasn't properly dressed. He was so glad to see her. It had seemed like an age had passed these past, dull days where he had not caught so much as a glimpse of her. In a second she was in his arms and he hugged her close.

She kissed him, which surprised Nathan. The other night had felt like a dream to him, and to have her kiss him now, on another day, felt just the same. Even better. He felt different around her. He wanted to be kind and polite to her. To please her. It was an odd feeling for him.

"I? Avoiding you? I thought that you were simply teasing me with your absence. Come, is there anywhere where we can talk and be comfortable? It has been a terribly long day, and I wish to here of yours. To here of you, in fact. I missed you." He said the last sentence like a breath of air that he had been holding since he last had seen her. Finally they were together again.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin stared up into his amazing eyes as he spoke. She missed him so much and it was like being home when she was in his arms. The only home where she felt wanted. Where she felt that she really truly belonged. She hugged him tight again, unable to let go. The other night didn't feel real enough to her. Yet, here he was in her apartment! She took his hand and smirked.
"Let's go to my room. We'll have all the privacy in the world. But we'll have to be quite." she whispered, seductively.
She led the way to her room. It was small, but she made it lavish. Her curtained bed and satin pillows. They were riches that she had saved to by with her own money. Her sister was totally unaware of the fact she had them, as well. If Alani knew, she would take them for herself. Oh the things she would do to her if that happened.

Kaitlin hurried Nathan in and shut the door quietly behind them. She sighed as she turned her back to it, and rested against it. Today had been tiring. She was constantly running around for the queen. Her sister decided that she was too good to serve today and disappeared after breakfast, leaving all the work to Kaitlin. Eventually she pushed herself away from the door and slumped onto her bed. Her eyes on Nathan the whole time. Her back ached and her legs were numb. Feeling her soft mat underneath her body was a relief.
"It was such a trying day. Nothing but work, because my too-good-for-this sister decided to take the day off. I'm exhausted. But I want to relax with you. she smiled.
She sat up slowly and draped her robe over the dresser beside her bed. She undid the simple braid in her long hair and shook her hair loose so it draped over her shoulders. Her dark eyes looked up to meet him, an ornery fire burning in them.

Kaitlin tucked her legs underneath her and sat there looking at the gorgeous man in front of her. Her eyes traveled down his body, thoughts racing through her mind. His muscular torso, to his legs, and everything in between. Most of her thoughts weren't proper or pure in the slightest. She didn't really care. No one could read her mind, and no one else was in the room. It was just her and Nathan. Alone.
"I hate not being able to see you during the day. Trying to look at you and feel total indifference is torture! Sometimes I feel like you're rejecting me, but here you are now. So that can't very well be the case. Perhaps I worry too much." she rambled.
None of those worries seemed important now. Now that she was alone with a man she could possibly love.

[Nathan Brown]

They went into her room.

He would need to use a large amount of self control. He didn't watch her as she took off her robe and got on her bed. He could not trust himself enough. Nathan went to the window and looked out, wondering why exactly they did have to hide. They were both well off people from well off families. Nice status. Nice social responsibility and so on. And they both had money! Everyone who was anything at court had money. So why did they have to hide? But he already knew the answer.

"Oh... what? Yes, me as well. I've missed you." And then he turned to look to her. She looked beautiful. But he stayed where he was. Still contemplating. Still controlling. "No, of course I'm not rejecting you. Why would I? Who could?" He let a smile onto his face. "Of course not." He added, reassuring her again, for it was ever so true.

He felt troubled by hiding away with her. Hiding the fact that they were slowly yet surely becoming more than fellow court members. But he would never leave her. He looked to the door, to make sure it was locked shut, then went to the bed and sat. "Pacify my thoughts Kaitlin." He said quietly, like some child who didn't want to think about a very bad day, "Tell me about your day. What did you do? Who did you see?" His voice was quiet.

He felt like he was doing something wrong. And yes he was. He should not be in a room with a girl, alone. At night, in such a casual manner. It was wrong. They were not married. Their parents did not know. But even so he still could not leave. Would not let himself. But to hear Kaitlin talk would calm him down. That voice of hers, like the singing of birds, like the gentle beat of a doves wings as it floated on the summer wind. It was perfect and sweet no matter what she was saying. He needed to hear it.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin was a little uneasy by Nathan's distraction. She was worried about him. He seemed so distant. She got up and went over to him. Gently she sat in his lap. She tilted his head up to meet her eyes and brushed his cheek softly.
"You don't seem happy, Nathan. What's wrong?" she asked genuinely.
Something wasn't right. Usually he was so ornery and full of life. Tonight he seemed burdened and sad. She didn't like seeing him this way. She wanted him to be happy. She wanted their time together to be memorable.
"Do you not want to be here with me?" she asked in a soft voice.

Kaitlin looked at her door. She wondered if her father was home yet. She wondered if her maid had gone to bed. She knew Alani was already asleep. That was given. Her sister could sleep like no one else could. Maybe Nathan would rather be with her sister than her. Maybe he had found another girl. That could be why he was so distant. His mind was on another girl that he had met. He had come here to say goodbye but she had forced herself upon him. She got off his lap.
"There's another girl, isn't there?" she asked her voice heavy.
She didn't want to think about that. The thought of loosing him was hard, but the reality of it happening was worse. She really did like him. A lot. But if he didn't return the feelings...there was no use worsening the heartbreak.

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan was surprised. She was definatley getting the wrong idea of what he was saying. A small smile appeared on his face. "No, Kaitlin. No one but you. I swear that. Truely, it's just been a long day, a long few days, really..." he stood and went to her and put his hands on her shoulders, completely sincere.

"I was only thinking of how I hate to hide like this. How I wish it could be different. And then thinking to myself, 'Why should be hide it?' We are both perfectly the same rank in court. We both have respectable families. So why must we hide? And then I became saddened by that thought, because I know that hiding only leads to being found. And that might bring the end of the two of us. So maybe hiding is not what we should be doing." He hugged her close to him, then pulled away again. "And all of these whirls of thoughts have suddenly come, and they overwhelmed me, is all. Do not worry that I would have any eyes for any other woman or girl but you."

"But Kaitlin," he continued, feeling ridiculously talkative, as though he had to get these words out before he forgot them, before it was too late, "Why do we have to hide like this? I can't stand it."

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin listened to him talk. So he wasn't seeing another girl. That was a relief. She let out a breath of fresh air as he continued talking. He had a great point. Why were the hiding? There seemed to be no point in it. Both families liked each other, both of them were the same ranking in the court, and both were well off in terms of money. She looked up at him, her eyes doughy and soft. She closed the small space between them and wrapped her arms around his waist. She laid her head against his chest and listened to his heart beat. Slowly she met his gaze.
"Your words are so true, Nathan. We have nothing to hide, so lets not hide it. Like you said, it could ruin everything for us. I especially don't want that to happen. I really do like you. I want to be with you." she said honestly.
She brushed his hair away from his eyes and drew him to her bed. There she sat them both down. He needed to relax.

Kaitlin traced the lines of his face. Her fingers brushed his ear, nose, chin, jaw, and lips. Taking in all the angles and lines of his handsome face. She brushed his neck and then started messaging his shoulders. He was so tense. Gently she worked his muscles so that they would relax and contract. Sometimes she did this for the king himself after a stressful day.
"You're much to tense. You need to relax. I will do anything for you, as long as you drop what's on your mind for just a few hours, so we can be together. I want you to be happy."
That's all she ever wanted for him. Happiness, and she would do anything so that she made it possible for him.

[Nathan Brown]

He could not tell her what he feared. He could not bare to bring up the fact that if in fact they did tell their parents, did make public their relationship, that his and her parents would head straight for marriage. Straight for making something of there children, not for the will of love but for the will to connect family ties. They would use a marriage between them, and quickly. They would use Nathan's... yes, he loved her. He couldn't help it. It was hard to explain, so quick. So sudden. He had to admit it. He loved her a lot. But they would use it to gain status. It's what everyone did. Yes they would be together, but it hurt Nathan to know that his family would care nothing for the true reason of marriage. And marriage? Marriage?

How sudden that would be. But it had to be. Marriage was of course required of him, and soon. Would Kaitlin and Nathan be married in this month? Next month? Even next year seemed to sudden. There was nothing against it, of course, but it was too quick. His father would not care. He would arrange it quickly. But what could be done of that if their parents agreed?

He could not bring himself to bring it up. He didn't want to scare her off, or keep on with this dismal talk. He just wanted to quiet down, to be silent. To listen to her speak.

She took him to her bed and sat him down beside her. He was quiet now, again back into the mood of simply trusting and letting her do what she wanted with him. She was touching his face, talking to him. He barely took in her words, but whatever she had said, he relaxed, forgot, and let her. After a moment, he took one of her hands, and held it close to his chest for a moment, then kissed it gently. "You are sweet." He said, smiling. What was this? What was wrong with him? Nothing. He was just... different, when he was with her. So different. "But Kaitlin... we should tell them shouldn't we." He said, still quiet, but firm and to the point, now. "We need to tell them all soon. As soon as we can. Not now, but soon. Tomorrow, perhaps."

Then he leaned in and kissed her, making himself keep his hands firmly where they belonged, instead of where they wanted to be.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin was nervous when Nathan was still quite and distracted. She didn't want him to worry! She just wanted to be with him and have a good time. She had missed him so much. She could tell that he had missed a lot of what she had said. It was upsetting her. Why was he like this? She hadn't been able to be with him in a few days and now his mind was elsewhere. She sighed as she pulled away and stood up. She looked at him, her eyes sad.
"Nathan. I want to be with you so much, but your mind is else where right now. If you would just rather leave, I will not stop you. I want our time to be together happy. I want you to be happy." she said getting a little worked up.
She was always a little dramatic. It was a downfall. She didn't mean to be, it always just happened that way. She loved Nathan. There, she had said it. She knew it was sudden, but not this sudden. But she loved him so much. She knew she had to tell her parents, but what would they say? They'd probably start the marriage arrangements. She didn't mind being married, but so quickly? She liked the idea of being able to be with Nathan, but does he?

Kaitlin sat down in her chair and put her head in her hands. She was so overwhelmed. Nathan was hear, but it was like he wasn't at the same time, they were going to tell their parents about them, marriage, love. Everything seemed to happen so fast. She took a few deep breaths and rubbed her face. She looked up at Nathan, confusion shadowing her ace.
"I don't know what to do, Nathan. All these things came up at once."
She paused and thought about what she was going to say next. Whenever a boy said 'I love you' to her she broke it off, not wanting to get tied down. But with Nathan, she wanted to say it to him. Really bad.
"Nathan, I-I think I'm in love with you." she whispered.
She was scared. Scared he'd reject her. She loved him, she just hoped he loved her back.

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan sighed. They would not be able to get around the subject. "Kaitlin, marriage. Marriage! He stood up and walked to the window. "That's the first thing they will do. Marry us so that we can extend our family lines, bring honor to our familys, gain more money being connected! Not marriage for love, not marriage for any good reason, for money! For status! I don't think that I want that. Not for those reasons." He was rather annoyed.

"I don't know what to do either, Kaitlin. It's not that I would mind marrying you, in fact if there was anyone in the country I would marry it would be you. But for those terrible reasons? And so quickly? Obviousley it would come with good consiquinces..." They would be able to share a bed, for instance, "But what good is that, when you know your being forced into it for status? And so soon."

Hold on. What had she said? So softly, so quietly? He had barely heard it. Barely been paying attention. Nathan turned around suddenly. "I... I do love you back, Kaitlin." He said quietly. Spitting out the truth. "I know, it's sudden. It's so sudden... I don't know what to do." It felt like a totally helpless situation.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin listened to him and understood. Their families would only be interested in marrying them to bring more honor and money to their name. They wouldn't care that they were in love or any of that. It was all about them. Then she heard Nathan say something. She looked up, her eyes wide. Did he just say he loved her as well? Could she really be hearing this? She got off her chair and went over to him by the window. He looked so lost and it pulled at her heartstrings. Gently she wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his shoulder. Soothingly she rubbed his back. She hated seeing him so worked up.
"We'll work it out, Nathan. We will. Maybe it'll take some time, but everything will turn out alright in the end." she said softly.
She continued to rub his back and kept her other arm around his waist. She wanted to be near him. She wanted to hold him. She needed to.

Kaitlin's mind drifted to the future. If they did end up getting married, what would it be like? She saw herself in a beautiful white gown with a handful of wild orchids. Nathan standing at the altar in a dashing black suit. They would say 'I do' and then there would be a big celebration feast in their honor. Alani wouldn't celebrate because she wouldn't be married yet or have a suitable suitor. Then that night. Well that night would have some amazing memories. She came back from her dream and felt Nathan's body heat seeping through her thin nightgown. She was a bit chilled. She turned her face up towards Nathan's and smiled softly.
"Can we please stop worrying about all this right now? We have time. We'll figure it out. I know we will. Right now, lets relax." she said her hands wandering down his chest.

Kaitlin knew that this dilemma at hand was important but they didn't have to worry about it right this second. She wanted to relax in Nathan's arms, and have the Nathan she met a few days ago back eve if it was just for an hour or two. She slid in front of him and kissed him softly, then a little deeper. She broke the kiss and touched his face. She wanted him to relax.
"Please? she asked somewhat like a child.
She didn't care if she was being childish. She was tired of worrying about something that could be figured out another day. It was the middle of the night. She hadn't seen him in a few days and this was not how she wanted her time with him to be like.

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan sighed. She was right. It was not fair for him to be worrying over all of this trouble when he had come to see her. He was her guest. Nathan could focus on all of this later. "Alright," Nathan said, "I deeply apologize." The motion of her hand on his back was comforting. It made him feel at home, and he was so happy to be with her. "I suppose we can talk about this, tomorrow. Or any other day." And then he leaned in and kissed her deeply, putting his arms around her waist and pulled her up onto his lap. Ah, those dreadful clothes again. Her dreadful dress, her dreadful skirt. It all just got in the way. But then again, it was a barrier between him, and something that he wanted, but could simply not do.

"Another day..." he muttered, breaking away for a moment, then going back to kissing her. He was her guest. It was his responisibility to please her, for she was kind enough to be the host.

He layed himself back on her bed. How wonderful it was to be alone! And Nathan brought her down with him, enjoying the quiet sound of his wish coming true. He was with Kaitlin again.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin couldn't have been happier when Nathan started kissing her. She kissed back deeply and wrapped her legs around his waist. She ran her fingers through his hair. She felt amazing. Then he went over to her bed and laid down. Oh it was so tempting. She got up on his bed and straddled his body. Her hair fell to one shoulder, her eyes were lit up and ornery. She leaned down and kissed him aggressively. Her lips wandered, not fully satisfied. She kissed his neck down to his collar bone. She explored all skin there before making her way back up to his lips once again. She rolled over to her side so she was facing Nathan. She pressed her body up against him and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"You've surprised me tonight. So far you have been quite the gentleman....I don't know if I like it." she teased.

Kaitlin rested her head on his chest and listened to his heart through his shirt. Stupid shirt. She opened her eyes and started unbuttoning it. Once she was done she opened it up and ran her hands down the toned muscles of his torso. That was more like it. Once again she laid her head on his chest. This time she felt his warm skin against the cold skin of her own face. She often got cold easy, but could get warm quickly. Nathan was perfect for that. She closed her eyes and continued listening to the beat of his heart. There was nothing else she wanted, but him.

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan loved her. It wasn't just lust, lust, lust, always lust with Kaitlin. He loved her. And he could not mess things up, could not tarnish her or her reputation ever. He knew that he must be careful. And even so, he could not help but continue to kiss her. Her legs were around him. His shirt was obviousley in the way, and it was coming off. No, he couldn't.... but he loved it. He had to stop himself. If they were caught, they wouldn't have a prayer of doing this without hiding. And that was what he wanted.

She was ever so right. He was acting like... a gentleman. He did not usually. Unless around the King and Queen. Or his family. And he faked that. But he felt a sudden need to be a gentleman. To act rightly before her. To be kind, polite, and chivalrous. It wasn't like him very much, but at least this was the honost gentleman of himself, instead of false actions and pretending. "Well, I can't help it, dear, you are indeed, a lady." He kissed her again. "But if you would rather..." and he unlaced her bodice. It was easier this time, and he quickly got rid of it. His hands found the edges of her skirt and gently his fingers went under it, feeling the smooth surface of her hidden skin. Not hidden for long... Nathan broke away from his kiss and grinned at her, then he moved out from under her and put her under him, taking his hands and pinning down her arms, desperate for every inch of her. He went in to kiss her again, firm and passionate. "I can resort to old ways," he said with a quick breath, "And you won't get away from me." And he continued his work, knowing the whole time, how totally wrong he was being.