Help me clear this doubt from my mind //Nathan

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin-Rose walked through the courtyard of the castle, in the middle of the night. It was an extremely strange time to be doing so. Not to mention dangerous. Warnings had gone out in the village and the castle warning the people of wolves straying into the kingdom. A farmer's boy was killed by one a few days ago. Still she went. She carried no torch and no means of any protection. She was literally flirting with danger. She glanced around and figured she was safe from any eyes that could be peeping out of windows. She took the pin in her hair and took it out, letting the soft waves of her hair glide down her back. She sighed as she turned her head to the sky and let the warm spring breeze blow across her face.

Confusion and doubt was haunting Kaitlin this evening. Words echoed in her mind, causing her unrest of mind. She decided to clear her thoughts by a walk in the moonlight. It shone brightly on her as she walked through the newly budded flowers of the gardens. Spring was on it's way. She hadn't seen Nathan for a few days now. She wondered if he thought of her as often as she did him. Her conversation with the queen still played in the back of her mind. You must tell them, Kaitlin. It will be trouble if you don't. Oh how right she was. But that sent fresh worry into her emotions. Telling her parents meant marriage. Nathan had made that clear. She was worried that he didn't want to be married. If he wasn't ready. She wanted to be with him. That was obvious. She was in love.

A loud howl to the moon broke Kaitlin from her thoughts. Wolves. Again, she realized that she was without protection, and completely alone. The creatures didn't seem too close, but not exactly far away either. She glanced over her shoulder, making sure she was still alone. But company would probably be a good thing in this situation.
Her thoughts drifted to Nathan again. His gorgeous eyes, strong build, soft hands. She wanted to feel the warmth of his arms as they wrapped around her small body. She wanted to know that he was hers and only hers. She wanted to hear him say that he loved her. A noise jolted her nerves, sending a wave a fear over her. Growling game from barely fifty yards away. Frozen with fear, all she could do was stand there and pray that someone would find her.

[Nathan Brown]

He should not have been outside at this time. For one it was very late, and another there were aparently a few wild animals prowling around that the servants were now searching for and attempting to trap. He shouldn't have been out there, nor any other noble family member. So why was he? He was thinking. And he couldn't do that inside with everyone running around making annoyingly polite conversation.

Nathan would just have to marry her when it came down to it. It wasn't that he didn't like her, or love her! He did, truely with all his heart. But it was so soon. It seemed so sudden. Marriage simply did not seem like much fun to him. He did not want to turn into his father. Getting married as soon as he could, and beginning to breed the next generation of the Brown family. It wasn't like Nathan to follow in his fathers footsteps. But he would do it without complaint. He had no other choice. And he would learn to get over the young marriage and live with it. At least it would be with a girl he loved. Well, a woman, really. And he needed to let her know this. Let her know that he would gladly marry her and was happy for it. He owed that to her.

He turned out of the grove of trees and onto the front courtyard, fully intended to put up his hunting equipment, for he had just returned from a small party hunt the same evening, and find Kaitlin-Rose. And he found her. Standing seeming transfixed in the courtyard, she seemed to be staring off into the... and then he saw it. A young male wolf standing not too far from her, staring right back. Nathan did not know what to do in the moment, but he pulled himself together. He had hunting equipment did he not? Well, now it was time to hunt. He snatched blindly at his crossbow, poised it shakily and as quickly as he could muster, and let the spear shoot flying toward the animal. With a wail, it fell to the ground. No matter if it was dead or not, Nathan ran to Kaitlin and took her by the shoulders,

"Come," he said, and then put his arm around her waist tightly, and steered her forcefully toward the entrance. "Are you alright?" He said gruffly, almost angrily. What idiot would let wolves amble into the court? They needed to hang the gaurds on watch at that time. He would do it himself. "Don't think I've ever been more terrified," he admitted still angrily, "Why on earth were you out here? You knew fully well that those beasts were roaming around. And coming out here with nothing to protect you but your good looks and a dress," Nathan scoffed,

"It's ridiculous. You needed to be inside with the Queen. It's obvious that every one of Her ladies were to get inside and stay put." He had been scared to death. That was the only reason that he was ranting and raving like this. He hated to think of what would have happened if the wolf would have gotten to her, and he was angry with himself for not doing something before it all happened. Of course it was a ridiculous want, but he could not help it. He wasn't meaning to yell at her and be angry with her, but it was the only way to let out his frustration at being afraid.

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin was frozen in fear. After she had heard growling a male wolf had stepped in front of her path. It's eyes glowed in the moonlight, his fur was beautiful and sleek. Such a beautiful animal could cause so much devastation. It took a step towards her. It growled low, its throat rumbling. It's lip drew back revealing stark white fangs. Huge, sharp, cut-through-flesh fangs. A breeze blew her hair back from her face, giving her no sense of security. She shivered with fear. Hoping, praying that someone would help her.

She realized now just how stupid it was coming out here on her own. She wanted to clear her mind, think about Nathan, and think about what could happen in her future, but instead she could be killed. Mauled by a wolf. Even worse, she had been warned. They had been told not to leave the castle without an armed escort and yet here she was. Shivering in the darkest of nights, with only the moonlight to guide her way. She wondered what Nathan would do once they found her body. Would he be upset, happy, sad, angry, hurt, heartbroken? She didn't know. It took another step forward and prepared to pay the price.

Just then Kaitlin felt a rush of air from behind her. Something silent and dark slip through the night air and hit the creature in the hind leg. She screamed as she saw the creature fall and felt someone's arm around her. Then she heard his voice. The voice she dreamt about most nights. Nathan. He dragged her along roughly yelling at her. She turned her head back to the wolf. It laid there on the ground whimpering in pain. Instantly her heart went out to the poor thing. She had always had a soft spot for animals.

Then Nathan's shouting pulled her attention back to her. She looked up at his face and saw the furry etched in his eyes. He was holding her tightly. Too tightly. His voice only elevated in volume. It was more than she could take.
"Stop it!" she cried frantically, trying to wriggle from his iron grasp. "Stop it, Nathan! You're hurting me!"
A tear fell down her cheek as she tried to break free of his grip. His words cut through her, like knives and daggers. He yelled about the rules and about how she should be in the castle. She couldn't take it. Not from him. She was used to it with her family, but hearing it from him hurt twenty times as bad.

Kaitlin sobbed as she broke free of his grip and fell to the ground of the courtyard. There was a dull ache in her waist where his hand had been. She knew what she did was wrong. She realized that a long time ago, but having him yell at her and hold her so hurtfully, hurt her more than anything she had ever experienced.

INVOLVING: Nathan Brown, Kaitlin-Rose Jackson
STATUS: completed
WORD COUNT: four hundred ninety-one
NOTES: this is my new posting style =)

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan let out a loud frustrated sigh when Kaitlin struggled against him. She was looking back at the wolf, with a somewhat sad look in her eye. There was something wrong with her if she was going to mourn the beast that could have killed her. "He'll be dead soon," he muttered under his breath. She yelled for him to stop but he didn't. She said he was hurting him but he still would not willingly let go of her. Not until he was sure she was safe inside. But she pulled away from him, collapsing on the ground and sobbing. What on earth was wrong?

He brought his hands to his face for a moment, then knelt next to her, his arm on her back. "Come now," he said, much quieter than his previous words, "Don't be angry with me. I should not have raised my voice with you. But you must see that I have just seen my whole life flash before my eyes. My whole life just about died, for you just about died. You can not be angry with me for wanting you safe." He could see that she was not at all happy with him, but what was he supposed to do? Smile and tell her, Well, at least we got him! Nathan thought not. "We can not stand out here anymore Kaitlin. Come with me and we will talk but I will not wait out here any longer. If you cannot come with me I will send someone to get you, but I would rather you come on along." His voice was cold, clipped and annoyed. Why had she chosen to cry in the middle of the courtyard while at any moment another one of the wolves could be anywhere? Why was it so hard for him to make things right?

[Kaitlin-Rose Brown]

Kaitlin heard his voice and felt his arm around her again. She had to dry the tears running down her cheeks. She looked up into his eyes, pain spun in her brown eyes. He spoke words, but her brain refused to absorb them. Her mind had gone numb. Her fear had dissolved, fatigue taking over her whole being. Weakly she rose to her feet and started walking towards the castle. She drew her hands to her head and managed to do her hair in a simple knot at the nape of her neck. She knew Nathan was merely upset that she had been out here and in danger. He was angry with her for being so careless. Once she saw the servant door entrance, she went up to it and leaned heavily against it.

Kaitlin looked behind her at Nathan. She could see the fear and anger etched his face. His wonderful handsome face. She turned away, uncharacteristically shy. She had felt like a silly little child depending on him to save her. She felt silly being out here. She had come to clear her head, but nearly got herself killed. Now Nathan was angry at her. Things never seemed to get easier. They just got more complicated. Which did not help her at all.

Kaitlin turned back to Nathan. Back pressed against the stone. She sighed and looked at him.
"Nathan I'm sorry. I'm sorry I have angered you. I came out here to clear my thoughts about....about you. I-I-I...." she stuttered.
She wasn't really sure what she was going to say next. She didn't want him to be angry with her. She wanted them to be happy together. To spend the little amount of time they had together, in each other's arms. Not fighting.


INVOLVING: Nathan Brown, Kaitlin-Rose Jackson
STATUS: completed
WORD COUNT: two hundred ninety-seven
NOTES: none

[Nathan Brown]

Nathan sighed and went up the steps to the door and to her. "You did not anger me. Not really, anyway. You just scared me. You could have died, or been hurt or any other awful thing, and I do not want that to happen." Then he continued, even though he didn't want to admit it, "I should not have yelled at you, but I do think we should get inside. I need to talk to you about telling my mother and father, along with yours. Shall we just forget about this?" Nathan took her elbow in his hand, gently now, not as gruff and hard as before, pleadingly looking to her, hoping she would not be angry with him for raising his voice. He would not be able to stand it if Kaitlin-Rose thought any differently of him for this, even though he would probably deserve it for manhandling her and yelling at her although she had not done anything wrong.

short... sorry...